Valentine's Day allergy

Does anybody really like Valentine's Day? Really, it's just too omnipresent- post offices, coffee shops, supermarkets; it's everywhere. Infectious and invasive. You just can't get away from it. Teddy bears, heart-shaped chocolates, pink fluffy nonsense all over the place. It's like an annual outbreak of a particularly virulant and unpleasant disease.

Anyway, I've been thinking on it lots and trying to analyse why it annoys me so very muchly and came to the conclusion that, well, basically, it's pants. It's the lovey-dovey, sacharine, Radio 1/tellytubby version of human relationships, and it just doesn't relate to anything that has ever taken place in my life, at any time, whatsoever. Maybe this just reflects how sad and lonesome I am, or maybe I just have really good taste, who knows. I just hate the whole business.

On the other hand, I don't object to songs, movies and other stuff about love in all its colourful and varied manifestations. In fact I quite like a bit of a lovesong sometimes, but it has to be realistic, or funny, or quirky; something you havn't heard a million times before.

So here it is, my anti-Valentine's Day playlist, with new and old favourites. I hope you like it:

Belle and Sebastian – Funny Little Frog- gets an honourable mention if only because of its rhyming of the words poet and thro- at. It’s sweet and charming and articulate without making you want to puke.

The Smiths- Girlfriend in a Coma- What can you say; classic. ‘I know I know- it’s really serious’. Yes indeed. Bitterness and strife.

Art Brut- Rusted Guns of Milan- a blokey point of view but funny and honest and entertaining.

Super Furry Animals- Fire in my Heart- not particularly original lyrics but sung with absolute passion and conviction (but not overblown in an eighties power-balladish way)

The Cure- Love Cats, or Friday I’m in love- jocular and upbeat, classic Cure (before Robert Smith stopped making fashion choices and became his own parody).

Primal Scream- (I'm Gonna) Cry Myself Blind- 'Have you ever had a broken heart? Have you ever lost your mind?' The answer's yes to both these questions.

*This list is neither exhaustive nor authoritative in any way what so ever. Please feel free to suggest alternatives.